When I got pregnant with Twins everybody and their brother's aunts had advice for me.
"Get them onto the same schedule RIGHT AWAY"
"Don't buy two of everything , you wont need it."
"Use just one Crib"
"Don't use matching names"
"Have a Csection it's safer"
and the list goes on....
I listened to a lot of what folks said and I do think we have been blessed. Ava and Lyv are on the same eating and sleeping schedule (although some days one might nap more than the other) but since they eat at the same time, play at the same time, bathe at the same timeish, etc they usually fall asleep around the same time. It makes our lives VERY livable because it means there are moments everyday where I have time without any babies needing anything from me!! This gives me time for school work, housework, time to enjoy with the older 2, and time with just Eric (This is of course unless as Murphy's Law goes...I need them to sleep..then they are typical lets defy our mommy boogers LOL)
We have actually bought 2 of a lot of things! I LOVE the whole twin thing. 2 of many outfits (not always the same color) 2 swings, 2 bouncers, 2 sets of bottles, 2 sets of bibs etc etc and I have found this to be very useful!
etc etc etc....I could go on and on about what we have done as our way to raise our twins but it's not necessary LOL....We have taken the advice that we wanted and discarded the rest. We do what WE need to do in order to make our family run as smoothly as possible. I must say for a family of 6 with FOUR kids 3 yrs old and younger I think we have a pretty darn good system down and for anyone who doubted us (MIL) We have once again proved you wrong. We DID in fact know EXACTLY what we had gotten "ourselves into" and WE WERE and ARE in fact able to handle things pretty awesome! SO NEXT time just keep your judgements and opinions to yourself. mk THANKS :o)
Back from my tangent:
BUT there was one thing that we heard OVER AND OVER AND OVER and several times it came from folks with multiples...
"It's a lot of work, especially with already having 2 so young, but you are going to be surprised at how you will no longer CARE how messy your house gets"
BUT I DO CARE!
Not a day can go buy where I do NOT dwell on how clean something might be. I will stay up til 3am to make it clean when I need to. When everyone is asleep and I have no school work I will NOT just sit down, I always am able to find something to clean. My kids make messes and I am not able to sit at nap time with a messy playroom. YES after nap they WILL remake the mess for me to re clean BUT at least I had my clean room for a moment LOL! I seem to get easily behind on laundry...but I CARE. Even when there is NOWAY for me to get caught up on a particular day its ON MY MIND. I scrub kitchen floors 3 times a week, bathrooms every other day and vacuum the living area twice daily and the bedroom multiple times a week. I reorganize the food cupboard twice weekly and clean out the fridge twice weekly. My sometimes cluttered desk gets organized EVERY night before bed and never will I go to bed with a dirty dish (aside from a bottle) in the house. Even when I am sitting at the computer to do schoolwork I usually have laundry or a dishwasher going.
All of what I mentioned above drives my husband MAD! It's a daily event that he gets to the point of asking me "if I even know how to relax?"
These all seem like normal chores for people so I never found it that odd, but when I talk to others it makes me realize jut HOW MUCH I dwell on things. Because even when it's "clean" it's not "clean enough" and MIGHT I ADD...I HATE when folks including my husband "help around the house" because they just can't do it "right" They can't clean it the way I would clean it...(Example: Eric put new diapers out on the changing table yesterday...but he didnt wipe the shelf first and he put them in the wrong direction and he overflowed the basket and laid diapers directly onto the shelf...so I got flustered and redid it...he also tries to help set the table at night for the next mornings breakfast..oy! In my OCD mind for the kids, the color of the the plate or bowl MUST match the placemat for that day and then the cup and spoon must also match (and TRUST ME WE HAVE PLENTLY of matching supplies) and if AJ uses any nautical or underwater cartoon placemats he MUST have his NEMO vitamins NOT his spiderman vitamins bc spiderman wouldnt match. These are the ridiculous expectations I have and Eric thinks its fine as long as there is a placemat, plate, spoon, cup and vitamin out. He doesnt care if its a blue and yellow spongebob placemat with a green plate, red cup, and normal spoon with spiderman vitamins. So AGAIN I end up redoing it or I WONT sleep. Things do not need redone if I just do them first time..saves us all time!
Do not misunderstand I have FAR from the cleanest house...midday my house looks its worst because that when we are all awake...that's when it looks "lived in" so to speak, but at night when I go to bed and in the morning when I wake up I look around and feel accomplished that things look so good! Its a shame my kids aren't quite as OCD as I am LOL I sometime realize I have some unrealistic expectations but that changes NOTHIGN!
So tell me moms....where is the switch?? How do I turn this obsession off? HOW do I learn NOT to care as much?? I would love to be able to "relax" instead of cleaning BUT I can't. I cannot sit and enjoy doing "nothing" when I could be doing something...
SO, to all of you normal folks....I am JEALOUS :o) I want to not care as much too!
This post put a huge smile on my face! I'm a clean freak too but it's something I've just learned is part of me - do I have to get it all done before I can relax? yes. Do I feel awesome when the kids are in bed for the night & I look around at a clean house? yes. Does it drive Adam mad? yes! I could list plenty of things that I do that others would think 'whacko!' & that Adam can't do the way I like.
ReplyDeleteIt's crazy, but it's me.
-Mallory
You GO GIRL!!! I admire that you strive to keep the house organized and clean all the time, but I hope you find time to relax too!! I have high expectations of wanting to stay super organized and sterile clean, but I differ in one area....I AM LAZY!!!! lol My house is clean, but no where were I "dream it to be"...I'm okay with that...at least for today.
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